• I was on a date & went through a red light camera. I received a letter in the mail, saying that she’s too good for me.3:56 PM May 8th from web

• I’m sitting next to a axe-murderer. “I axed her about that thing that the dude axed her about, after axing his sister.”1:06 PM Nov 2nd from web

• I just bought a new translation of the Bible. Before every OT prophecy are the words: SPOILER ALERT!9:30 PM Nov 5th from web

• Gonna have a vintage Halloween: candy cigarettes, bubble gum cigars, chewy little liquor bottles & rubber band masks.9:29 PM Oct 30th from web
• A screaming 2yr old was kicked off Southwest Airlines… if it was Northwest, they would allowed the baby to fly the plane.9:25 PM Oct 30th from web

• Don’t know what to get a Northwest Airline pilot for Christmas? How about a Snuggie & a Do Not Disturb sign.10:50 PM Oct 26th from web

• World Series starts & will answer the age-old question: Which city will host the violence when their city wins the trophy.10:28 PM Oct 26th from web

• A new study shows being the President of US ages you 2yrs for every year. Being Lindsay Lohan ages you 20yrs for every year.11:25 AM Oct 23rd from web

• Today, Snoop Doggy Dog is 38 in human years… how many is that in… ?9:10 PM Oct 21st from web

• Annoying kid asked me what was the Pony Express. I told him that they were the WIFI carriers of the old west.3:47 PM Oct 21st from web

• I received a letter in the mail! I didn’t know how to boot it up. Where’s the power source? Where do I plug it in?11:36 AM Oct 21st from web

• Cute girl said to me: “Email me.” I said that I will text her. She said she didn’t have text service. It didn’t work out… unequally yoked.9:27 AM Oct 20th from web
• My friend Ray is conducting a Summit with General Tso and Captain Morgan. Cap’n Crunch is not invited until breakfast.8:28 PM Oct 19th from web

• Simple Halloween costume this year. Going as Balloon Boy. When I get to your party, I will just go hide in the attic.3:38 PM Oct 16th from TweetDeck

• Girl hinting about diamonds/flowers: “U know what girls want?” Me:”Uh, a really good pair of Spanx?” “What!?” “Nothing”4:43 PM Oct 13th from web

• I’m standing behind a lady wearing low-rise jeans, who shouldn’t be. I think we are now legally married in 3 countries.3:06 PM Oct 9th from web

• Alfred Nobel, the inventor of dynamite, leaves behind a legacy. Jimmie “J.J.” Walker’s: “DYN-O-MITE!!” Thank you, Nobel.12:12 PM Oct 9th from web
• We are going to bomb the moon… just in case Osama bin Laden is there. Leave MARS alone, or it will “make me very angry!”9:48 AM Oct 8th from web

• We are going to bomb the moon… then we will look for weapons of mass destruction.7:43 PM Oct 7th from web

• Tonight the neighborhood is having a NATIONAL NIGHT OUT for crime awareness. I will stay inside… I’m scared of the neighbors!5:04 PM Oct 6th from web

• When the Cowboys are on FOX, I am always afraid that the FOX robot mascots will attack & hurt Tony Romo. Oh my!3:23 PM Oct 4th from web

• Now is the time of the year that I get free candy off of people’s desks & save them up to give out on Halloween.3:16 PM Oct 1st from web
• I wish my brain would wake up at the same time that I do… I can hear my brain still snoring inside of my head.9:42 AM Sep 30th from web

• I always wanted a girl that had the body of Angelina Jolie & the morals of Sis Theresa but I dated girls w/body of Sis Theresa & morals of Angelina7:17 AM Sep 27th from web
• American Girl has a new doll called Homeless girl. Look for the forthcoming Crack Head doll & The Amy Winehouse doll10:28 PM Sep 26th from web

• Salt Lake City: a truck overturned on an interstate, covering a lane of the roadway with french fries. I’ll be in Salt Lake w/some ketchup.9:20 AM Sep 24th from web

• The SNUGGIE now has imitators… the SLANKET. Please don’t confuse that with a SKANK-ET… which is something entirely different.11:29 PM Sep 20th from web

• President Obama is appearing on 5 talk shows this AM & his frequent primetime speeches is on TV more times than the Shamwow commercial.5:36 PM Sep 20th from web
• Guy: “Do you even KNOW the last line of the National Anthem?” Me: “Uhhh, ‘Gentlemen, please start your engines?’”9:55 AM Sep 19th from web

• HS teachers are upset that students are using texting words in papers. OMG! Really? That’s barrising! LOL!11:51 AM Sep 15th from web

• 2 girls were stuck in a storm drain w/cellphone, updated their Facebook status instead of calling 911. I was taking a quiz or I would’ve helped.12:50 PM Sep 13th from web

• I need to hitchike home today from the hospital, so I will hike up my gown & flip my thumbs on the interstate… Sexy!9:07 AM Sep 10th from Tweetie

• For now, I am only allowed clear liquids… sounds like my neighbor, who only has vodka for his meals.2:15 PM Aug 25th from web

• Elderly man in line: “You know what the AARP is, don’t you?” Me: “Uh, the mafia for older folks?” “What!?” “Nothing.”3:10 PM Aug 24th from web

• Healthcare… is there an app for that?1:29 PM Aug 23rd from web

• I wash my Hand Sanitizer bottles down with soap & water… is that weird?6:31 AM Aug 23rd from web
• My Hand Sanitizer says it gets rid of 99.9% of germs… I am now worried about that .1% of germs that is ALL OVER ME!!!1:46 PM Aug 22nd from web
• I wonder if my pastor likes Tacos al carbon y al pastor.1:39 PM Aug 22nd from web
• I think I am getting older… I no longer daydream about beautiful girls… I now daydream of Cooper’s Barbeque! Yum….11:26 AM Aug 22nd from web
• I think Obama Healthcare is like my old high school football coach’s… “Just walk it off!”9:55 AM Aug 22nd from web

• A guy told me that he only gets his news from The Daily Show on Com Cent. I told him that I get my news from The Real Housewives of Atlanta.1:22 PM Aug 15th from web
• They are putting a camera down my throat today. “I am ready for my closeup now, Mr Deville.”7:44 AM Aug 14th from txt
• They will stick a camera down my mouth tomorrow to check my stomach. I am demanding HD cameras & a percentage of the DVD sales.7:00 PM Aug 13th from web
• Study shows a cut in the risk of death from heart disease 4 heart attack survivors who eat chocolate. Take 2 Snickers & call me in the AM.10:00 AM Aug 13th from TweetDeck
• It is illegal to yell, “Health Care!” in a crowded theater.1:05 PM Aug 12th from web

• I saved $300 a month in gas in my new VOLT car… & spent $3000 on my electric bill! I’m green!8:07 AM Aug 12th from Tweetie

• I went to a boxing match and a Health Care Town Hall Meeting broke out.12:57 PM Aug 11th from Tweetie

• I have the funniest nurses… If I say anything that they don’t like, they turn a knob and then, BLAM! …it’s the next day all of a sudden!2:11 AM Aug 9th from Tweetie

• Nurse: “How tall are you?” 5 foot 5. “I was determining how much calories you are to eat.” Oh, I meant to say that I am 12 foot tall.1:24 PM Aug 8th from web

• I have 2 ice cubes that have never let go from the tray from way back from 1993. I admire their persistence.5:48 AM Aug 4th from web

• I have set my alarm tonight for Jon&Kate’s return… I want to make sure that I miss it.8:26 AM Aug 3rd from web

• 150 ppl overcome by fumes at Bank of America call center. Firefighters say it was just perfume. Another plug 4 Amy Winehouse perfume!12:14 PM Jul 30th from web
• Michael Vick says he is close to finding an NFL team… he says he has a few search dogs sniffing them out now.11:30 AM Jul 30th from TweetDeck

• I waited doing my laundry long enough, that they got up on their own & put themselves into the washer & started it.12:37 PM Jul 28th from web
• Officials are looking into where Michael Vick was when the Taco Bell dog died… they insist it’s just a investigation.12:14 PM Jul 28th from web
• I took a shower w/new bacon-flavored soap & took a walk around the block. I was followed by stray dogs who took advantage of me!9:19 PM Jul 27th from web

• I went to Sam’s Warehouse & bought 300 rolls of toilet paper… you think that will last a week?6:15 PM Jul 26th from web
• NBC continues its Sunday Movie Disaster of the week. Last week was meteors, today is Storms, next week is Obama Healthcare.5:00 PM Jul 26th from web

• I had a open faced bologna sandwich today… I only had one piece of bread left.9:30 AM Jul 26th from web

• Met former Spur Monte Williams. I am half his size so I am a half Monte & he is a full Monte… wait, that sounds bad.10:31 PM Jul 24th from web

• They say Obama is on every channel right now… I turned to watch him on Fox dancing on You Think You Can Dance. Go Obama Go Obama!7:02 PM Jul 22nd from web
• I like this hospital gown… I think I will wear it on my next date.3:23 PM Jul 22nd from Tweetie

• I was on a date & went through a red light camera & received a letter in the mail, saying:”Ehhh! You can do better.”11:30 AM May 22nd from web

• Cute young mail lady rang my door & asked for my name. “Wow, it’s Tracy, what’s yours?” “None of your business, I have a registered letter.”3:47 PM Jul 20th from web
• Annoying guy said: “Did you know Louie Armstrong landed on the moon 40 years ago today?” “Neil?” “I’m not going to kneel about it!” “Okay.”12:45 PM Jul 20th from web
• Rice Krispies are talking to me again… they’re saying: “Get a better breakfast.”9:31 AM Jul 19th from web

• “Would you like American cheese with that?” “American cheese, huh? Let me see the birth certificate.”8:41 AM Jul 16th from web

• Annoying guy asked me if I knew how to make white people go crazy.I replied, “Uh, either play the Chicken Dance song or YMCA?”11:38 AM Jul 15th from web
• Girl was flirting w/me & casually mentioned she is wearing bacon-flavored lip balm… I almost asked for marriage right there!10:59 AM Jul 15th from web

• I need a Hispanic accent module for my GPS… currently my GPS lady mispronounces all the streets in San Antonio.8:43 PM Jul 14th from web

• I miss those Reply-All emails throughout corporate, where most of them reply all saying: “Stop Replying All!” Good times.8:47 PM Jul 13th from web

• I had to use a motorized cart at the grocery store. I raced an elderly lady… she won. She even came back & offered to help push me.4:01 PM Jul 13th from web

• As long as I laid perfectly still & didn’t move, the pain would go away.” Nurse: “Sounds just like my honeymoon.” “Wha-what?” “Nothing.”9:20 AM Jul 13th from web

• Going to the hospital again in the morning… I now have my own VIP parking space & designer gowns.9:09 PM Jul 12th from web
• Do you want the Gucci gown or the Doche Gabana hospital gown?” “Definitely, the Doche Gabana gown.” “Good choice, sir–let me measure you.”7:45 AM Jul 13th from web

• Is this the end of the line of The Biggest Loser auditions? “What’s that supposed to mean!?!” Uh… nothing… just wondering.11:48 AM Jul 11th from web
• I went to a combo gas station/McDonalds. The Big Mac kept changing it’s price every 30 minutes. $1.00, $2.20, $4.50, $1.00.10:43 AM Jul 11th from web

• “Sir, here is your free Chik Fil-A because you are dressed as a cow today.” “I’m not dressed as a cow!” “Oh… my mistake, sir.”10:18 AM Jul 10th from web

• Guy in line at McDonalds:” I want some suhweet tay to drank.” “What is suhweet tay?” “Suhweet tay, you know, like to drank sumptin’.”6:24 PM Jul 9th from web

• I eagerly await the premier of the new Sonic guys commercial. I camped beside my TV all night long.10:12 AM Jul 9th from web

• Chi:9,000 lbs Chinese food was spilled onto tollway. Problem with spilling Chinese food on tollway is an hour later U have to spill it again10:36 AM Jul 8th from web

• Nurse gave me a Barium milkshake to drink… I asked her to Super Size It & add a burger&fries… she just stared at me… I took the drink.10:24 PM Jul 7th from web

• Cat scan done… They didn’t find any cats, but I now purr when I am happy… Purr!9:20 AM Jul 7th from txt

• At lunch, I am going to have Italian food today… I just ordered some anti pasta and some anti tea.11:03 AM Jul 6th from web

• I have ANOTHER Doctor’s appointment tomorrow… whenever I arrive, everyone shouts out, “NORM!”7:38 PM Jul 5th from web
• The City of Pleasanton, Texas reached 107 degrees today, and they officially changed their name to Miserableton, Tx.5:08 PM Jul 5th from web

• I was disappointed in yesterday’s fireworks. It looked too familiar… I think they ran a rerun from last year.3:37 PM Jul 5th from web

• It was so hot today, that I was sweating buckets… but no more! I just bought a shirt made out of the Super Sham Wow!2:32 PM Jul 2nd from web

• Cheating Governors… there’s now an app for that on my iPhone.9:50 AM Jul 2nd from web

• Guy complaining in line that ICE AGE 3 is wrong-dinosaurs weren’t there after Ice Age. I reminded him its a CARTOON, they don’t talk either!7:40 PM Jul 1st from web

• This weekend, as a single guy, I will be celebrating Independence Day… what will you married people be celebrating this weekend?6:53 AM Jul 1st from web

• “Hi, are you here for the Biggest Loser auditions.” No. “Are you sure?” Yes. “Umm, okay… sure you don’t want to try out?” No. “Ohh-kayyy.”5:08 PM Jun 30th from web

• My fortune cookie said: “You will soon be eating a stale cookie after reading something stupid & meaningless.” It was TRUE! Spooky.9:01 PM Jun 28th from web

• My doctors says I need 3 square meals a day… so today I will have waffles, a pop tart, and some Cheese-Its… they are square.1:44 PM Jun 22nd from web
• I decided to buy a pair of pants 10x my size, just so I could take a picture of me in them while stretching it out… to impress others.11:02 AM Jun 22nd from web

• Do they make Spanx for the chins?4:57 PM Jun 17th from web

• It was so hot today, it started to mess with ladies’ makeup at the mall… they all looked like a painting by Picasso.6:42 PM Jun 15th from web
• It was so hot today that when I rebuked the devil, he said: “Fine, it’s too hot around here anyways.”5:13 PM Jun 15th from web

• Conversation over lunch, guy kept saying, “You know?” No, I did not know…1:34 PM Jun 12th from web

• Apple introduced new iGirlfriend 3.0… it costs a lot and it requires a 2 year commitment & penalty for early termination.7:54 AM Jun 12th from web

• Lady sues CRUNCH BERRY, because they R not real berries. I sued FrankenBerry & Count Chocula… they’re not real monsters!1:37 PM Jun 10th from web
• I had some chicken last night… it tasted like rattlesnake.9:36 AM Jun 10th from web

• I just got a discount generic bumper sticker at Walmart… it just says, “Bumper Sticker”7:02 PM Jun 8th from web

• I was watching a demonstration at store, when guy next to me says, “THAT’S what I am talking about!” He never said a word before that.11:07 AM Jun 8th from web

• I can’t remember… what’s the name of the Dave Matthew’s band?7:58 AM Jun 5th from web

• I got my hurricane preparedness package today… 4 D batteries, a cell phone, and 12 boxes of twinkies… I am all set.3:34 PM Jun 4th from web
• Chocolate Coma–They say chocolate make the same feelings in humans that love does… All I know, is that I am now engaged to chocolate cake1:20 PM Jun 4th from web

• I was talking 2 a friend on the phone when he suddenly said, “NOW you’re talking!” I wasn’t sure what I was doing prior that statement12:13 PM Jun 4th from web
• Little known fact: Chocolate cake consumed on your birthday has no calories!12:01 PM Jun 4th from web
• I was on TV last night for a few minutes… I needed the extra lift to get to some cob webs on the ceiling.9:45 AM Jun 4th from web

• I ran into a guy at the mall who stuttered AND had Tourette’s… it took him awhile to curse me out… so, I waited.10:19 AM Jun 3rd from web

• Co. selling Hummer to Chinese company. The problem with Chinese Hummer is an hour later you have to buy another Hummer.3:23 PM Jun 2nd from web
• I got a Charley Horse muscle cramp in my bad leg when walking through the mall… I did get 3rd place in a Dance contest that was going on.3:18 PM Jun 2nd from web
• At church, I like to wait for the little waste basket that people pass around to discard my old gum in.1:50 PM Jun 2nd from web

• GM (Government Motors) announced a new green car, The Obama GT. It doesn’t take gas, or run at all, but it does take your money.11:36 AM Jun 2nd from web
• I got a salad with eggs, bacon bits, pasta, more cheese, croutons, chicken, tons of dressing, and uh… oh, I forgot the lettuce… oh well.10:58 AM Jun 2nd from web

• Thousands flocked to the site of where a man says he saw Jesus in a book. This unidentified book is a collection of 66 smaller books. Weird.11:22 AM May 29th from web
• I was at the mall & tried on some great smelling cologne, when a clerk approached & said, “Sir! That perfume is for DOGS!” I growled at her.8:43 PM May 28th from web
• Does a whale ever say, “Does this blubber make me look fat?”8:16 PM May 28th from web
• I was at Sea Island today, but as I was getting my food, it was hijacked by Somalian pirates… I had to settle for a hushpuppy.4:24 PM May 28th from web
• I am not saying that my last date was very robotic, but she kept saying, “Must find Sarah Conner!” I will not be back…6:54 PM May 27th from web

• How do swear jars work? Do you just put the jar over your mouth and let loose?2:24 PM May 27th from web

• Someone at Gitmo was about to be waterboarded, but SAWS water police showed up & gave them a fine… it was not their designated day to waterboard.2:45 PM May 26th from web

• Being in a hospital for about a year, really affects your dating life.10:35 AM May 26th from web
• On rainy nights, I like to play a CD of a rainy night… it’s more realistic than the actual storm.1:39 AM May 26th from web

• My GPS is stuck in Spanish, what does “estúpidos incorrectos dan vuelta alrededor” mean… I think it means I’m almost there.5:14 PM May 25th from web

• I have too much to do today! Let’s see, nap, cat nap, power nap, resting my eyes, sleeping it off, passed out, dozing off… too much to do!11:48 AM May 25th from web

• I am wearing my new T-shirt today: “Don’t talk to my face, save it for my Facebook!”12:18 PM May 23rd from web

• I saw Snoop Doggy Dog going to visit Michael Vick today at his house… this is not going to end up well.10:37 AM May 21st from web

• I’m hungry… is there an ap for that?7:40 PM May 19th from web
• The “You Can Sing the Phonebook” finals on American Idol is tonight. The guys will sing random phone #’s from their hometown.6:33 PM May 19th from web

• Going to Alamo City Roller Girls event w/female friends.There was fightin, clawin, scratchin, & yellin’.And that was ON the way to the event12:40 PM May 17th from web
• Gov. Rod Blagojevich’s helmet of hair has inspired a line of shampoos & conditioners, Suggested brandname:”Gee, Your Hair Looks Ridiculous!”5:20 AM May 17th from web

• I went to Salvidor Dali’s old neighborhood. I had no idea that he actually was a REALISTIC painter. Everything is melting in his hood.3:38 PM May 15th from web
• I went through one of them red light traffic cameras and I received a letter in the mail saying that my clothes are out of fashion.3:02 PM May 15th from web
• I got a ticket for not wearing my seatbelt. I was walking on foot around the park at the time.6:27 AM May 15th from web

• Daydreaming. Tracy is a fan. Become a fan.7:31 AM May 14th from web

• In Tx, Governor’s race w/Perry&Hutchinson are close in polls. I am waiting for the swimsuit competition before I make up my mind.9:45 AM May 13th from web

• How long after a nap is taking a nap too soon?5:26 PM May 10th from web
• Nap. Tracy is a fan of Nap. Become a fan.3:44 PM May 10th from web

• People usually have photos of their loved ones at work to remind them of what they truly love. I have a photo of myself sleeping in my bed.9:22 PM May 6th from web

• I better hurry up and get my nap in before I go to sleep tonight.6:14 PM May 6th from web

• Fox is suing Bollywood for making an Indian version of MY COUSIN VINNY. Not sure if the title will be MY SLUMDOG VINNY THE LAWYER.8:25 AM May 6th from web

• A red light traffic camera sent me a note in the mail to clean up my back seat.11:25 AM May 4th from web

• The airline charged me extra today for being overweight. Which is weird, because I wasn’t even flying today.9:35 AM May 4th from web
• I’m making some extra bucks by selling ad space on the front of swine flu masks. Right now, I sold space to Air Mexico & Piggly Wiggly.1:29 AM May 4th from web
• My travel agent messed up & booked me on the ALL PETS ONLY airline. I was so upset that I ordered extra Kibble n’Bits for my dinner.1:44 PM May 3rd from web
• I went to my doctor’s office to check for swine flu. Doctor tells me to open my mouth and say “Squeallllll!”7:30 AM May 1st from web

• “Yea, dating is getting to know you better , but I already read your Facebook profile and there is no need for me to go out with you now.”4:43 PM Apr 30th from web

• They say to wash your hands long enough to sing the Alphabet Song, or Happy Birthday twice… I sing the Funky Cole Medina song myself.8:26 AM Apr 30th from web

• I was watching the Spurs play and they were about to make a basket but they were hijacked by Somalian Pirates, who took away their ball.11:27 PM Apr 25th from web

• I saw a sign at Target that said:”These items proudly made in the USA”. In fine print at the edge of the sign it said:”Sign Made in Vietnam”2:44 PM Apr 25th from web

• Will they ever do a remake of the TV series, “Pink Lady and Jeff?” I missed it the first time around.9:19 AM Apr 24th from web

• I went to a book signing today by a famous author. Since I only have a kindle book reader, I had her sign the screen with a marker.10:20 PM Apr 22nd from web

• Do they make Spanx for men?6:05 PM Apr 21st from web

• At the Fiesta Tamale Fest eating contest, I came in 3rd. I didn’t even know there WAS a contest… I just like eating tamales. Viva Fiesta!5:07 PM Apr 20th from web

• At friend’s house to see their new baby. After holding her, I put her down in the corner. Parents screamed:”Nobody puts baby in the corner!”4:09 PM Apr 19th from web

• Texas might secede from the Union. If Mexico attacks us and wins, will we become Texico? North Mexico? New New Mexico?11:29 AM Apr 19th from TweetDeck

• I went to pay for my Fiesta taco with a credit card. Lady checked it & said:”I’m sorry, your Facebook updates are just too stupid. Declined”10:46 PM Apr 18th from web

• I went to the bank to cash a check. They wanted ID, took my finger prints, a blood test, heart check, and asked me walk a straight line.10:27 PM Apr 18th from web

• (body shaking) Need more Cadbury Creme Eggs! (rubbing arms) Anyone have any left over Cadbury Creme Eggs? Please? I can stop at any time.7:20 AM Apr 18th from web

• My iPod Touch told me to knock it off. We are just friends.2:41 PM Apr 16th from web

• I just updated all of my online passwords to: “Again.” I kept receiving the message: “Wrong Password, Try Again.”11:39 AM Apr 16th from web

• Priceline just got me a cheap vacation package for just pennies. I’m headed out to Somalia on a cruise tomorrow morning.11:16 AM Apr 16th from web

• I upgraded my iPhone to the zzzzzzPhone. It just sits there and doesn’t ring.4:47 PM Apr 15th from TweetDeck

• I woke up so gassy this morning that OPEC knocked on my door and gave me a reasonable offer. I’m taking it.9:16 AM Apr 15th from TweetDeck

• On the next “You Can Sing the Phonebook” on American Idol, contestants will sing their hometown phonebook, but just the addresses. 123 Main!6:37 PM Apr 14th from web

• Sign outside of H&R Block: “Taxes done now with no trans-fats!”7:07 PM Apr 13th from web
• My password on online services is always: “ANOTHER.” I got tired of receiving the message: “Wrong Password choose another.”6:10 PM Apr 13th from web

• They say to put milk & butter into your Kraft Mac&Cheese. If I could afford the butter&the milk in the first place, I wouldn’t do the Mac&Ch2:13 PM Apr 13th from web

• What if you don’t have any hamburger for your Hamburger Helper? Do they have a Hamburger Helper Helper?2:10 PM Apr 13th from web

• So what do you do if you are dating someone and after a date they suddenly change their online status to: Very, VERY Single as of right now!3:29 PM Apr 12th from TweetDeck

• Overheard: “When I saw that, my head literally exploded.” Really? Your head is doing pretty good for having just recently exploded.1:12 PM Apr 11th from TweetDeck

• My bottled water says, “Now with NO trans-fats!”8:19 AM Apr 11th from TweetDeck

• Calories only exist on foods that you eat with a fork. Therefore, I eat everything with my fingers. Mmmm…. steak….5:21 PM Apr 10th from web

• My pet rock ran away today. I’m putting up signs. Reward.3:21 PM Apr 10th from web

• Budweiser is no longer the best-selling beer in the world. It is now SNOW from China. Problem is an hour later you have to drink more beer10:33 AM Apr 10th from web

• After I filed my taxes under ‘single’ status again this year, the IRS sent me a letter to “meet somebody already!”6:51 AM Apr 9th from web

• In South Africa, termites are roasted & eaten by the handful, like popcorn. I think Northwoods Theatres accidently served me termites. Yum!!3:17 PM Apr 7th from TweetDeck
• Twitter down for 1hr. I had to go to strangers. “I’m doing laundry.” I see sir I am with you. “I’m putting in soap now” Gitawayfromme, sir!8:39 PM Apr 6th from TweetDeck

• My new phone knows where I am & how to get where I am going, responds to my touch & voice, and entertaining. I might just start dating it!8:58 AM Apr 4th from web

• Fast & Furious today. Car crashes, cars speeding, fights over cars, explosions. And that was just on the way to see the movie!12:06 PM Apr 3rd from web

• To help with the automobile’s bailout, Obama fired the CEO of GM. Today, he is expected to fire the CEOs of Tonka Trucks & Matchbook Cars.7:37 AM Apr 3rd from web

• I bought a bootleg copy of Slumdog Millionaire. It turns out it was Slumdog Wheel of Fortune about a slacker in Los Angeles who buys a vowel6:55 AM Apr 3rd from web

• “You can sing the phonebook” next week on American Idol. Contestants will sing their hometown’s phonebook. “John Smith…555-13133333333!!!”6:46 AM Apr 2nd from web

• Storms took down the electricity. I am now obligated to eat 2 gallons of ice cream very quickly. I don’t have any now but I will go buy some2:37 PM Mar 26th from web

• Twitter shuts down fake Austin Police Dept site. I was wondering why my twitter kept asking me to pull over.3:22 PM Mar 23rd from web

• Chinese drywall is ruining American homes. The trouble with Chinese drywall is an hour later, you have to do some more drywall.11:34 AM Mar 22nd from web

• American Idol Trading Cards. “I will give you two of my Ruebans for one of your Carrie Underwood’s. Oh man! I can’t get rid of my Sanjanya!”1:10 PM Mar 18th from web

• On COPS, a officer tells a drunk to recite the alphabet without singing. I tried it and I just can’t do it without breaking out into song.11:12 AM Mar 18th from web

RETWEETING PIRATES IN THE REDLIGHT DISTRICT
(C)2009 by Tracy Young www.tracyyoung.tv

“Tracy Young, a man enjoying his life, now barely alive. We can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to perform a lot of surgeries and to pray for him. We can make him better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster. We will spend over six million dollars on him over eight long months.

During those eight months, his faith will be tested many times. His Church will gather together with Earth-shaking power and prayers. His friends will bond together during these visits in the Valley of the Shadow of Death.”

I do not mind going through the Death Valleys, but I would like to spend more time resting peacefully next to the still waters. I understand that time is needed there to learn, grow and to shape my destiny. I just want some vacation time in the green pastures for a little while longer. I promise that I will go back into the dark valley and have my dinner that was prepared for me in front of my enemies. I do not want my food to become cold. No one wants a cold, prepared dinner, especially before enemies. Why, they would laugh and point their callous fingers at me.

There were times in a hospital bed when I would become scared. However, I would not fear the evil that was attacking my body. God comforted me! Goodness and mercy would follow me all the days of my life! I was going to dwell in the house of the LORD Forever! (Taken from Psalm 23)

Real miracles happen instantly. I have prayed over people and saw them healed immediately. I have watched prayer warriors speaking to various illnesses or ailments and viewed the instant miracles in their lives. So, why did it take me eight months, multiple life-saving surgeries and countless hours in therapy relearning how to stand, walk and talk?

Jesus and His disciples would pray and the miracles would just happen.

“And Jesus went about all Galilee, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the gospel of the kingdom, and healing all kinds of sickness and all kinds of disease among the people.” (Matthew 4:22-24 NKJV)

I had prayer teams all across America praying powerful prayers over me, and they believed with their whole heart that I would just jump out of bed and do a jig. However, I remained in the valley without dancing.

Even though a miracle might happen all of a sudden, ‘healings’ are a process. Healings will take time, maybe even years. Even now, my body is still healing, but I am a living miracle. I had numerous problems in my body. I had most of my vital organs shut down and I was too weak for the surgeons to do everything that they needed to do in any one session.

Slowly, several miracles started to happen. My organs slowly started working again, one by one. It was a miracle each time that an organ decided to perform their job. Each surgery was life-threatening and a long shot, but a miracle happened each time. The healing process may have taken the long way around in the dark valley, but I WAS healed! If your healing is taking awhile for you, please don’t despair. Keep your faith. Remember, even faith as small as a mustard seed will comfort you during your walk.

During my hospital stay, I still prayed for others, including healings. My pain did not stop me. I sowed my healing into the healings of others. I comforted many that came to comfort me in my bed. You WILL reap what you sow into others. With the same measure you use on others, it will be used with the same amount back to you. So, start praying for others as well as for yourself!

“Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” (Luke 6:38 NIV)

Many people, who had their own difficulties with their health, would pass along powerful wisdom to me. They told me their own testimonies with healing and miracles. Some were in the valley for a short time, some longer, and a few were still in it.

“All praise to the God and Father of our Master, Jesus the Messiah! Father of all mercy! God of all healing counsel! He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us. We have plenty of hard times that come from following the Messiah, but no more so than the good times of his healing comfort—we get a full measure of that, too.” (2 Corinthians 1:2-4 MSG)

They all told me to read all of the healing scriptures and to recite it out loud with authority. Since I could not talk with tubes in my mouth, a friend set up a CD player that played healing scriptures on a continuous loop. It played while I was in a coma and all of the way through my physical therapy. Those scriptures were engrained into my head and into my spirit. I believed them. Even if I were to have died, I would have breathed my last breath still believing in those scriptures. Keep praying for yourself and for others.

“Stretch out your hand with healing power; may miraculous signs and wonders be done through the name of your holy servant Jesus.” (Acts 4:30 NLT)

Yes, we all have to go through those dark valleys, but your Shepherd will restore your soul, comfort you, lead you, anoint you with oil and give you all that you need so that your cup runs over.

“Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the LORD
Forever.” (Psalm 23:6 NKJV)

—-
FORGET THE VALLEYS, I WANT GREEN PASTURES
(C) 2009 by Tracy Young www.tracyyoung.tv

“Don’t worry about your pain, God has a plan.”

“God will make a way out of no way.”

“When God puts you on hold, don’t hang up.”

“When God closes a door, he will open a window.”

“IF it is Your will, God let Tracy live.”

INSTEAD: They prayed everyday for eight long, long, long months that I would not just live, but live life abundantly, WALK again, TALK again, and serve God again. They demanded repayment for everything that was stolen from me… and they rejoiced when I WALKED out of the hospital.

They didn’t give me jargon, they gave bold, life-changing, prayer-believing declarations. Get some good God-loving friends into YOUR life, and when it gets dark, God AND your friends will never leave your side and will believe the best will come!

When you are in the dark valleys, Christian Jargon does not comfort those that hurt. They irritate and do more harm. Even if the jargon is correct, those going through a dark valley want you more than your empty words. Instead of meaningless jargon, pray life into the valley. Your actions mean more at that time than your words.

Don’t go into a hospital room if you do not have faith. Pray that God will give you faith first. Pray boldly even if it is to their dying breath.

Give yourself and leave the jargon at church… or even better, leave it entirely.

I had bodyguards assigned to protect me from any unruly church members who may want to hug me a little too long. Leaders were afraid of my frail state and that my immunities were still weak. It was suggested to me to reach my arm out to try to prevent them from hugging. That did not work. I would put my hand out to shake it with someone and then endure that awkward moment where they would still hug me with my hand out. The outstretched hand would then have to give a friendly pat on the back or that person would never let me go. I was accosted by several good-intentioned people who would suffocate me in their armpits and then beat upon my back. Even those who would shake my hands, would still hug me at the same time.

My bodyguards just watched beside me. It’s a good thing they were there; otherwise I might have been attacked by another smiling lady shouting, “Hallelujah! You are a miracle, do you know that?” “Yes, I do.” “NO! You are a miracle!” “Yes, I am.” “NO! Do you really, really know that?” “Yes, I do.” This interchange would go on until another lady would grab me.

One of those smiling people was an actor that I had worked with before. He was directing a new movie and wanted me to do a cameo in it. It would be my first film since I got out of the hospital. Even though I still needed a cane to walk, I was determined to do the scene without it.

A month later came and my scene was ready to shoot. This was an independent production and you could tell by the fact that the director’s wife arrived to pick me up. I must say that I have never had the director or the director’s wife pick me up for a movie shoot before.  I felt special. I rode along with the small children of the director to the airport, where our scene was to be shot.

I walked into the area in the busy airport where the actors were to meet. When you work on major films, you can easily recognize the main actors; however on an independent film, you do not know who anybody is. The other actors see this frail guy walking up to them with a cane and they are wondering if I am going to ask for a handout. Instead, I tried to break the ice with some levity. “Where’s my trailer?” I shouted out forcefully. Apparently, I did not put enough sarcasm into my voice as they took me seriously. I am an actor after all, so I made it seem real. They did not know my sense of humor, so immediately I made everyone feel uncomfortable.

We sat in the airport chairs for our makeup. I watched her put everyone’s makeup on, except for mine. I never did get any makeup. I had done films before without any makeup, so I figured they wanted me “AS IS.” They did not want to cover up the natural beauty, I tried to convince myself. I went over my three lines with the two page portion of the script that they allowed me to have. I was to portray a Guardian Angel, but I had no idea what the film was about. I did know my three lines. There are no small parts, just small actors… however; EVERY actor still knows how many lines they have. It is part of our breeding.

In my scene, I was to run across the airport. I still needed a cane to get by, but I had practiced all day without it. The director told me to just do it with the cane. That is how I became a Guardian Angel with a cane. Don’t all Angels have them?

All of the airport authorities knew we were there and they also knew that we had two actors who were portraying police officers during a fight scene. Even though their costumes did not fit properly, they were still asked questions by airport travelers. They had to shoot the film around real people, as they were not allowed to shut the entire airport down.

This scene has the main actor acting peculiarly and then is confronted by an actor portraying a police officer, who draws his gun. Another officer comes into the scene as backup, with his gun drawn. They shout for the main actor to get down on the ground. During the first take, a REAL police officer pulled HIS gun and told EVERYONE to get down on the ground. He apparently was not at the meeting and did not comprehend all the cameras, lights, boom mikes, etc. He was VERY close to shooting the actors! All cameras were rolling and I hope that footage will make the DVD release.

I spent eight months in a hospital… released a few weeks… and then almost killed while acting! During all of the remaining takes, the director would shout out in a sing-song fashion, “Standby for the ACTORS who are ACTING in this scene…. ACTING! PRETEND! Don’t shoot us!”

I asked for hazard pay. I can’t fall to the ground! I would never get back up! I may have been mistaken for someone who is threatening the officer by still standing… and I had a big, black stick in my hands! “Hey officer! Let me limp over to you very slowly and timidly hit you with my cane!” “Freeze, sucka!”

I had two scenes that day, but I later found out that the actors that I did the first scene in were all wearing the wrong clothes from a different scene.  That is one scene that will not make the film, as they only had the Airport permit for that day. We will see if the mystery of the cane-walking Angel makes the final cut of the film or not. Either way, it was fun to get back on the horse again after lying in a bed for most of the year. Independent Films are usually more interesting and fun to work on than the mainstream ones… I tried to convince myself.

It’s true, though… if you do not get shot in the process!

===

ACTING IS DANGEROUS TO YOUR HEALTH

(C) 2009 by Tracy Young www.tracyyoung.tv

I would be in surgery the next day… again. Instead of my usual room in the ICU, I was on the opposite wall of the hospital. They were glass walls and if I would squint, I could look past the nurse’s station and see the ICU. I could see my regular room. That room where so many of my friends would come to pray for me, to talk to me, and to give me encouragement. That was the room where I did not know what God had in mind for me. That was the room where I did not know if I were to live or die. That was the room where God comforted me through the pain.

During that time, people had put up blank poster boards on the walls. Friends who visited would leave various Scriptures and quotations on them. The posters were right across from my bed at my eye line and I would meditate on those words of wisdom. I did not recognize all of the people on those posters. Some came down to visit even though I did not remember them. Some said that they had never visited anyone in a hospital before but something drew them to my room. Many times, I would catch nurses reading those posters with different reactions. I was not supposed to live. Anyone with a little medical knowledge knew that the odds were against me. Those nurses remembered the words on my wall.

My friend Joey wrote “Warrior” on my wall. There I was, unable to move, unable to talk, unable to eat nor able to lift my hands. “Warrior,” I would say to myself over and over again. I had no strength in my body, but I knew that I was a warrior, ready for a fight. That fight would be for my life.

As I lay in my room, I was hungry. My stomach was talking angrily with me. I would not be able to eat anything until after the surgery. I would not be able to actually eat for another two months, enduring hospital milkshakes through a hole in my stomach.

I should be asleep for my big day in the operating room. Pain raced through my body. I felt around for the tube that contained the nurse’s call button. It had fallen from my bed and was out of reach. I could not talk or make any sounds. My thoughts turned to prayer, but I had no words to pray at this time. Usually during these times, I would just pray in tongues inside of my head.

However, the pain took my energy away from me. I wondered if I would ever get out of the hospital. I wondered if I would ever speak again. I thought about those nice long walks at the Guadalupe River. I wondered if I would ever write again. I wondered if I would ever pray for people again. My eyes started to tear up and I started to sob. My body started shaking from the emotions. The room became blurry to my eyes as they overflowed. I had been strong when the nurses said that I may not survive. I was a rock during those first few surgeries. I was a warrior when I started to drift away on that operating table. Except here, I started to fall apart. I was tired.

I was tired of all those hourly shots to test my sugar levels. I was tired of those three in the morning blood withdrawals in my arm. I was tired of not being able to communicate with anyone around me. I was tired of the constant pain. It was exhausting for me.

I thought about all of those people who prayed for me the last few months. They would even come down to the hospital waiting room when they were not allowed in. I wondered if I would have done the same thing for them. Honestly, I did not think that I would have.

I started to thank God for those people. Everyone that came to mind would have a short prayer lifted up for them. I asked God to return the blessings to them. People’s faces kept popping in my head and each time that it would, I would pray for them. I prayed for those people who gave blood in my name. I prayed for those people who took care of my house while I was in the hospital. I sang praises about those who took care of my finances and legal documents. I shouted for joy thinking about those who gave out email updates on my progress. I cheered when I thought about people all across the country that was praying for me. Other churches in other states were praying for me. How is that normal?

Even though I remained in that hospital bed with pain running through my body, I felt calmness in my room. I could feel the Spirit of God comforting me in that room. My eyes still remained blurry, but I felt my lips taking the shape of a smile. Smiling before a surgery? Had I lost my mind? Was I sleep-depraved?

A nurse entered my room and turned on a light. It must be time for my three o’clock blood-letting. “Sir, I need to see your arm.” I raised my right arm up towards her. She took it and started to rub alcohol over it. “Mr. Young, are you crying? Are you in pain? Do you want me to give you something, Mr. Young?”

I could barely talk but I gave it a try. I whispered, “Can I pray for you?”

She chuckled, “Pray for ME? Why, I should be the one praying for you!”

“Please?” I asked.

She looked puzzled and stopped rubbing my arm. “Okay, go ahead.”

“Lord, thank you for this wonderful lady. Thank you for giving her a great gift and talent. Thank You for bringing her into my life and helping me right at this time. I know that You have picked out blessed people to take care of me and it is no accident that she is here with me today. So, bless her and give her unwarranted favor in her career and shower her with love from her friends and family. I pray in Jesus’ name. Amen.”

“Uh, Amen,” she said. “Well, I just have one thing to say to that.”

I asked, “What’s that?”

“Hold your arm steady.” She then poked my arm with a needle and gathered up blood.

“Ouch,” I exclaimed. She had taken me by surprise.

“All done,” she said as she put a bandage on my arm. “See you in two hours. Get some sleep.” She turned out the light and walked out of my room.

Somehow, I thought it would have turned out differently. I rubbed my eyes to dry them. I stared at the blank walls.

My posters did not make this current trip. I tried to remember some of the quotations. “Warrior,” I said to myself. “Thank you, Lord.”

At the glass doorway, the nurse appeared. “Uh… well… uh, thanks.” She turned and walked away from sight.

I smiled. “Thank you, Lord. Thank you.”

I covered myself up with a sheet.

“This warrior is going to be okay.” I went to sleep.

===
(C) 2009 by Tracy Young www.tracyyoung.tv

Your father is a great man of God. Your father is a great doctor. Your father is a great father. Your father is a great man.

I went through Bell’s palsy, knee problems and other various ailments with your father. I camped in his waiting room at least three years of my life and spent thousands of dollars in co-pays. I may have paid for your education, but I am not sure.

At a pivotal point in my life, your father took on the assignment to take control of my medical needs. I went to him when I did not know what was wrong with me. I hate going to doctors but I was talked into it by one of my friends… and the severe pain in my stomach. It was decided that I was to go through a series of off-site tests right away. I was scheduled for three tests that day but I only made the first one.

During the cat-scan, the assistants determined that it was an emergency and called your father right away. Your father told them to immediately call the EMS ambulance and to send me to the hospital. For an unknown reason, they wanted to just send for a non-emergency transport that might take an hour to get to me.

I am not sure what was said, but I could hear your father yelling at them over the phone to get the EMS right away. They then decided to argue with your father about which hospital to send me to. Of course, your father won this pointless argument. I was transported straight from the cat-scan machine onto the gurney and sent straight to the hospital that your father wanted.

In a panic, I started making frantic calls to anyone that I could think of. Karen was the only one to call me back while I was still in the ambulance. Karen kept repeating, “Tell them that I am your sister!” The last thing that I remember that day was going through the two double doors of the hospital. I made it just in time, due to the swiftness of the EMS crew and the quick thinking of your dad.

During my long eight-month stay, your father was there almost every day. He kept me updated and prayed for me. He assembled a top-notch team of doctors and approved of every step that was taken. During a dark time, he sang songs about healing to me. I looked forward to his cheerful smile each day.

His prayers were heart-felt and real. He was honest and told me the facts. However, he let me know that not all facts are the truth. All of my organs shut down, but that did not stop your father from praying for me. Pastor Rick has stated that he only wants true-believers at his death bed, believing that he will be healed. Even to his last breath he wants them believing. I was surrounded by people that believed. Joey, Amber, Karen, Autumn, Chris Nault and many, many others. Your dad believed in my healing.

Suddenly, my organs came back online, one by one. Your dad still prayed. I started to get strength into my body and your dad still prayed. I started to walk and your dad still prayed.

I was released and your dad rejoiced.

Your father took a tough assignment.

I am grateful that he did.

–Grateful and alive,
Tracy

God bless.

Miracles?  I did not believe in miracles.  Every time that I would hear someone boasting about their miracles, I used to cringe a little bit.  I did not think that they were outright deceitful, but I did think that they just did not know any better.  Maybe they thought that life would be easier to get through if they just believed in miracles. Maybe they just needed the hope to carry on.

I thought miracles only happened when you no longer had hope.  Maybe they happened when you just barely had hope.  I did not believe in miracles, but I now know for a fact that they are real.  I spent eight months in the hospital with barely any hope left.  I did not have any energy to keep the hope alive.  I did not have the faith to continue for the entire eight months.  However, I had just enough faith to get through the next day.  Sometimes, I just had enough faith to get through the next hour.  The Bible told me, “My grace is sufficient for you.”  During the harshest of times, I kept repeating to myself, “This too will pass.”  Many times, I just had enough faith to just get through the current procedure.  Before I knew it, I was walking out of the hospital.

 No matter what I was going through, a Scripture verse was there to comfort me and guide me.  When I no longer had words to pray, the Holy Spirit was there to pray the perfect prayer.  The Holy Spirit’s prayer would be joined by the prayers of my family and my church family’s prayer.  During each surgery, members of my church would gather in the waiting room, just to pray for me.   I felt those prayers.

People asked me if I was getting closer to God while I was laying there in my hospital bed.  I had several IV’s and tubes in every place that they could connect them.  I had large tubes in my mouth, which prevented me from praying out loud.  However, I prayed every chance that I could in my mind.  I would even sing songs and pray in tongues in my mind.  It was just one long eight-month prayer.   I rarely had any opening or closing remarks.  It was just a continual prayer with many hours of just laying in the presence of God.  Do not wait until you are in a hospital bed to lie in the presence of God.  Do it every chance that you can. “Blessed are those who wait upon the Lord.” (Isaiah 30:18 NIV)

This was not easy for me.  There was many times where I would just cry out to the Lord.  However, I learned long ago that God never answers the questions, “Why me?  Why now?  How long?”  There were better questions to ask God.  “Are You still going to use me?  How can I still do Your will?” 

“I waited patiently for the Lord;
He turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
He set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the Lord.”  (Psalm 40:1-3 NIV)

Even though my nurses and aides saw some of my lowest moments, they still knew that my life was very different.  They noticed the presence of God in my room, even though some of them did not even know what that was.  They noticed that I still had hope, even though at the time I only had a small percentage of living.

One day, there were several people from my church in my hospital room.  My surgeon gallantly came into my room and interrupted our conversation.  He introduced himself and explained what he was going to do in my surgery.  He was blunt about the dim odds of living through the procedure.  Suddenly he took my hands and bowed his head.  He said, “Let us pray.  Lord, I ask that you bless this surgery.  I humble myself before you and ask that you guide my hands and bless them as I work on this child of God.”  He boldly prayed filled with faith and assurances that God would give mercy to me and let me live.  The room was stunned, as they did not even know that my surgeon was a bold man of God.  After his Spirit-filled close, he suddenly left as quickly as he came in.  The room was filled with the Spirit of God.

I had two friends of mine honestly talk about what was going to happen to me.  We agreed that I needed a Power of Attorney to talk for me when I could not talk.  They left to go get the legal paperwork.  As soon as I signed my legal voice over to them, the stretcher arrived to pick me up for surgery.  Pain filled my body as they lifted me unto the stretcher.  My vital stats started to go south.  As they ran the stretcher down the hallways and through elevators, I saw the ceiling lights swinging by me, as though they were animated.

Once we entered the operating room, I noticed that my two friends came in without any masks, gloves or surgery jackets.  I still had my mind working and realized that they should not have been allowed to be in the operating room.   Unknown to me, the nurse let them in to “say their final goodbyes.”  One of my friends interrupted her and said that they would not accept that.  They believed that God would work a miracle in me and they will stand in agreement with the surgeon.  The nurse told them that I only had less than a fifty-fifty chance of survival.  My friend told her to stop talking like that, as I might still be able to hear them.  That was the last thing that I heard before the medications took over.

Up until this point, I was actually ready to go to Heaven.  I already had God’s peace upon me.  I still had things that I wanted to do for God, but I realized that I will ALWAYS have something left to do.  I knew what Paul was talking about when he said, “To live is Christ, but to die is gain.” (Philippians 1:21 NIV)

After the operation, the surgeon went to the waiting room and explained the facts to those who came to pray for me.  Afterwards, he prayed with them and then disappeared.

Hope came in the form of a God-fearing surgeon.  Hope came in the form of several God fearing, praying and believing brothers and sisters in Christ. Previously, all of my organs had shut down.  Miraculously, they slowly started working again on their own.  I had several doctors of all faiths and religions.  Some of them did not believe in any kind of god.  At a meeting together, they did acknowledge that “something” had happened to me that they did not understand.  Some of these doctors did not believe in miracles, but every one of them admitted that something special happened to me.  Just maybe, they admitted, that it came from a higher power that they did not understand.  A seed of hope was put into their hearts.  Hope was alive and growing in them.  Even in the darkest of hours, God still allowed my life to be used as a shining light to others.

 I do believe in miracles.  My body is a living, breathing testimony of God’s grace, which is sufficient for me.  Will you allow God to work a miracle in your life?

====
Hopeful Miracles by Tracy Young
(C) 2009 www.tracyyoung.tv

I got the attention of the waitress as she went by.  “Waitress?  Here’s my card.”

Some of the guys out there might have experienced what I am about to tell you.  Usually, it is done very discreetly and without the date’s knowledge.

After some time went by, the waitress quietly came up behind me and poked me softly in the shoulder.  My heart sank as I knew what it might be.  I pretended to not notice her.

The waitress proceeded to poke me again, “Excuse me, sir.  We need to talk.”  Still not looking at her, I simply shook my head no.  I didn’t want to hear anything that she had to say.  Her pokes became harder and more painful.  Finally, I quietly turned to her and explained my situation.

“Ma’am, I have automatic deposit and I will get my paycheck processed somewhere in the next two hours.”  The waitress frowned as she did not want to wait for two more hours to close this bill.

I then ordered another drink.  I turned to my date and asked her if she wanted one, as well.  My date sighed and shook her head.  Sighing on a first date is not a good sign.  When the waitress reluctantly left to get my drink, my date asked me, “I thought you said you could not drink another drop?”  I stared at my empty glass and replied, “Uh, saying that made me a little… uh… parched.”  I faked a parched cough.

The waitress came by and slammed my tea on the table and stormed off.  I tried to give a friendly chuckle to my date as I attempted to clean up the puddle of tea on the table.  My date was downright staring at the tea on the table.  I realized that she was waiting for me to finish it right then and there.  I pretended to sip a little bit.  “Mmmm… refreshing.”  I gave her a little smile.  I did not dare to actually drink this tea as I was pretty sure that it contained some additives that I may not care for.  It probably contained spittle collected from the entire kitchen staff.  I saw their heads through the little round window from the kitchen, laughing at me.

I needed to check my bank account balance to see when the automatic deposit would actually be coming through.

I pulled out my cellphone and stared to dial.  My date looked at me and asked, “What are you doing?”

“Uh…  I am… uh… calling my mom.”

“It’s after ten o’clock at night.  Let her sleep.”

“Uh… my mom is a late sleeper.  She’s up right now.”

“Oh well, that sweet of you, I guess.”

I get my bank on the line and proceed to press my account number, my pin number, and various other things.

My date questioned, “What are you doing now?”

“Um… my mother has an elaborate voice mail.”  My phone blurted out, “From this point on, just speak your answers.”  My heart sank.  The phone asked me if it was for Savings or for Checking.”  I said out loud, “Checking.”

“What did you say?” my date asked me.

“Uh, I said I am just checking on my… uh… mother.”  The phone asked me another question.  I replied, “Current amount.”

“What?”

“I am seeing if my mother is… uh… currently about.”

My phone told me that I now had a current and available balance.  I hung up before hearing the actual amount, as long as I had something in there now.  I flagged down the waitress.  “Check please.  Try it again.”  The waitress just stared at me with a frown on her face.  “Please?” I pleaded with her with sweat bubbles forming on my forehead.

The waitress sighed and picked up my checking card and disappeared into the back.  It was at that moment that I noticed that quite a few people were standing lined up behind me, including the manager and a few guys that looked like they were wrestlers with the WWE.  One of the wrestler’s nostrils was flaring in and out with every breath.  I could now feel pools of sweat forming in my armpits.

Thankfully, the waitress returned with a little book that told the story of what we had ordered.  I was glad that it was just a short story.  I wrote the tip down and signed the receipt.  I attempted to try to hand it over to the waitress, but she did not react to my outstretched hand.  I took the receipt back and scratched out the tip and added another ten dollars.  I initialed it and handed it back to the waitress.  This time, she took it and told me to have a nice day.  I did not that she was actually concerned with my nice day.

My date stood up without any conversation and proceeded to the front door.  I caught up to her and asked her if she was available again the next day.  She replied that she would be busy washing her hair.  I asked her about the day after that.  She said she would be busy taking a shower.  I attempted a little humor, “At least I got you today when you are dirty.”  Immediately, I wished my tongue was broken.

She turned around and said, “You know, you look very tired.  I think that you should go home right now and not worry about seeing me home.  I will take a taxicab home.”

I replied, “No, I am not tired…”

She cut me off and said, “No.  You definately look tired.  You should go home right now.”  At that moment a taxicab pulled up and she got right in.  She must have called for it earlier, when I did not notice.  As the taxicab pulled out, she rolled down the window and said, “You should go home now so that you can get up early in the morning to go to work and make some money.”

I shouted out to the fleeing taxi, “How about next week, then?!”  She rolled the window up and disappeared onto the main road.

“Yea, she wants me, ” I told myself.

===
BANKRUPT DATE
(C) 2009 by Tracy Young www.tracyyoung.tv

“And whatever you ask in My name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask anything in My name, I will do it.” (John 14:13-14 NKJV)

“Yes, but not about finances, right?”

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. ”Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”  (Luke 11:11-13 NIV)

“Yes, that’s good and all, but I can never see myself praying about my finances.”

“Yet ye have not, because ye ask not” (James 4:2b KJV)

“I don’t know if I can have the confidence to do that.”

“This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.” (1 John 5:14 NIV)

“What if I ask for something selfish?”

“When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.” (James 4:3 NIV)

“Does God really want to hear my little prayers about my finances?”

“The Lord detests the sacrifice of the wicked,
      but he delights in the prayers of the upright.” (Proverbs 15:8 NLT)

“Yea, well I am not sure that God will help me.”

“I tell you the truth, you can say to this mountain, ‘May you be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ and it will happen. But you must really believe it will happen and have no doubt in your heart.” (Mark 11:23 NLT)

“Well, I do tithe and follow the commands of the Bible, but I don’t know if I am confident that He would really pay attention to me.”

“Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him.”  (1 John 3:21-22 NIV)

“I am still a little doubtful.”

“But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” (James 1:6 NIV)

“So, if I pray with confidence, what would He really do for me?”

“Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you.” (Luke 6:38 NKJV)

“So, after I pray, to whom should I thank?”

“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” (Ephesians 3:21-22 NIV)

“Thank you.  I think I will pray for my finances.  God wants me to.”

===
AM I ALLOWED TO PRAY FOR MY FINANCES?
(C) 2007 Tracy Young www.debtfreelegacy.com
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People from various doors started coming out to meet those who were already outside. We asked each other if they were okay. We figured out that my neighbor was the target and was relieved to know that she was alive. She was hyperventilating, but all right. Confusion and fear overcame the neighborhood. The only limited information we had at the moment was that it was a white truck that had terrorized our little block. At that moment, another innocent white truck started coming down the street. Neighbors started dropping flat to the ground while others ran behind trees or cars. We did not know who our enemies were. Soon, the neighborhood was filled with sirens, police cars and paramedics. Index cards in the street marked the bullet casings. Men in suits arrived and took statements. Holes in a jagged line remained in my sweet neighbor’s house.

Later, I talked my neighbor on the other side about the incident. Her husband is a police officer who was away on duty at the time. She heard the shots and immediately turned out all the lights and hit the ground. I realized how foolish I was. Her husband would have grabbed his weapon and acted in a trained precise manner. She said that you have to have a weapon, knowledge and training, otherwise you are just acting foolishly.

There is a spiritual battle going on and you are part of that war. John 10:10 tells us that the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy. He will leave behind terror, fear and confusion. We can fight the enemy, but you better have your weapon, knowledge and training.

“I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you.” (Luke 10:19 NIV)

God has given the body of Christ the authority to withstand the enemy. We have the authority to use the name of Jesus and the enemy will flee. We can bind the enemy’s plots and desires.

“And I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” (Matthew 16:19 NKJV)

Train yourself in the knowledge of the Word of God. Memorize the verses where attacks come from the most. When you see the enemy coming down your street and he starts to attack your finances, your health, or your life, you stand on the Word of God.

Realize that all evil spirits are subject to your authority in Christ Jesus. There is nothing that the enemy can do to harm you in any way. You have all spiritual strength, mental strength, and physical strength over the enemy. You command the spirit of disease to leave you alone and you command the spirit of poverty to leave you. Whatever goes against the Word of God is not allowed in your life. You are a child of God, bought and paid for at a price. Jesus paid that price for us and God has given you the authority to use the name of Jesus. Gain that knowledge, practice and train with that knowledge and then act upon it.

Do so, and you will not be someone running outside to face the enemy with just his bare hands, but you will be a mighty warrior facing the enemy with a large tank and the barrel aimed at their heads.

Weapons. Knowledge. Training.

===
SPIRITUAL WARFARE ON THE BLOCK
(C) 2007 Tracy Young www.debtfreelegacy.com
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I quickly combed my hair and threw on some clothes.  The studio was going to supply the wardrobe.  It was exciting, but I still had no script.  I still had no idea what  my part was going to be.

I went outside and noticed the driver standing by my open door.  It was thrilling for me to think about MY open black limousine door.

 ”Who died?” I said to the driver, trying to lighten up the mood.  The driver stared off to the side with no expression. I quietly entered the vehicle.  “Oh, sir?  Do you know when I will receive my script?”  The driver closed the door in my face.  “I will take that as a ‘No’, then,” I said to the closed door.

The driver entered the vehicle and drove off quickly.  He had the divider up and I was denied more of his witty repartee with me.  The limousine was filled with leather seats, electronic devices, and a wet bar.  I refrained from opening the roof and sticking my upper torso out of it and screaming at my neighbors.  After all, I am a serious actor now.  I was going to have a line or two in a televised production.  I hope they still have an empty star left for me on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

We arrived outside of the studios and pulled up to a guard tower.  The guards were checking everyone’s identification.

I reached behind and grabbed my wallet.  It took me a moment to pry out my driver’s license.  When I had it ready to show it to the guards, I noticed that we were already driving inside the gates.  I put my license back into my wallet and hoped that the driver didn’t see me doing it.

We drove through the lot, passing several huge buildings.  Actors and various people were walking through the narrow passages.  I tried very hard to spot a famous face.  My heart was pounding wildly.  In my wildest dreams, I never thought that I would be having this experience.

 Way too soon, the limousine pulled up to a building and stopped.  A female production assistant, opened my door and said, “Tracy?”

“Guilty,” I replied.

“Guilty?  What are you guilty of?”  She looked at me with a quizzical look.  She had a headset on her head and she carried a clipboard.

“Oh…  Uh, I am guilty of having just too good of a time with my driver.  He was just telling me all of these wonderful stories about his family.”  As soon as I closed the door behind me, the driver took off quickly and squealed his tires.  I waved at the dust and yelled out, “Yea, I will see you later at the cast party… uh… Max.”

The production assistant looked straight at me and said, “Are you done?”

I cleared my throat and said, “Quite so, ma’am.”

“This way then.”  She started to lead me into the huge shed-looking building.  A small placard on the door simply read, “DREAM STUDIOS.”

Wonderful air conditioning hit my face and then the wonderful sights hit my eyes. As far as I could see, there were multitudes of great sets, people and equipment. “Oh my,” I said with a quiet awe.

“You act like this is your first time here, Tracy.”

I looked back at her with a startled expression. “This IS my first time here.”

Her face looked saddened. “My mistake, then. I will take you to makeup and wardrobe. Your scene will go on around two in the afternoon.”

“Do we have a script yet? I was hoping to memorize my lines.”

She looked down at her feet. “Yea… about that. We are currently going through a writer’s strike. All scripts have to be accounted for. You will receive your script right before you go on and then you have to immediately return it. If it goes down to the wire, you may have to read it straight from the TelePrompTer.”

“I didn’t know about the writer’s strike. I guess I can read it from a TelePrompTer, if I have to. So, what do the writers want?”

She looked up and came over to me with her nose close to mine. “More important, what do YOU want?”

I was taken back by the question. “Me? I just want to know what my part is around here.”

She mumbled, “You still don’t know, do you?”

After a moment of awkward silence, I responded with a smile. “Well, I can play whatever part you give me. Let’s go get me made up.”

As we entered the makeup room, I finally asked, “Why would we use a TelePrompTer? Wouldn’t we just shoot short lines at a time?”

She laughed, “This is not a movie set, Tracy. We do live broadcasts around here.”

I looked around at the other actors. “What show is live at two in the afternoon?”

“First of all, it may be two in the afternoon here, but it is two in the morning on the other side of the world…”

I interrupted, “Then, what show is on at two in the morning?  It must have lousy ratings.”

“Our shows are the highest ranking programs in the world.  Our broadcasts are seen by every single man, woman and child.”

The makeup artist spoke up, “Don’t forget the many animals out there.”

 The assistant looked at the makeup artist, “Oh yes, there are many animal species that tune in, as well.”

“That’s impossible,” I replied.  “There has never been a program that has been seen by every single man, woman and child.”  The makeup artist started to speak, but I beat her to it. “… AND animal.”  The artist nodded her head in approval.

 ”Do you even know WHERE you are, Tracy?  This is where dreams are made from.”

“Clever…  Dream Studios is where dreams are made from.  I like your slogan.”

The production assistant put her hands on my shoulders and quietly spoke.  “Tracy… this is where… DREAMS… are MADE from.  Do you understand me?  Dreams?  Made from?”

 She was waiting for my response.  My thoughts were unthinkable.  I looked over to the makeup artist.  She nodded at me.  I stared back towards the assistant.  She nodded at me.

 ”You are all crazy!” I shouted at them and sprang from the makeup chair.

The assistant followed after me.  “Tracy, of all people, why are you having this hard of a time accepting this?”

I stopped and turned back to her. “Why do you keep saying my name like you know me?  I have no idea of who you are! I think you somehow spiked me with a strong medication!”

“Has it been so long that you have completely forgotten?”

“Forgotten WHAT?”

She looked down at her toes again.

I repeated my question, “Forgotten what?”

“This place.   When you were a child, you used to run around this place like you owned it.  Everyone knew you, from the decorators to the actors.  Your shows used to be inventive and exciting.

“MY shows?” I looked at her for a long time.  I slowly turned around and started to walk away.  I did not remember what she was talking about.

She ran over and went past me.  She opened a curtain that revealed a set with a production already in progress.  “Look at this.”

 In it, a man had uncaged birds tied to his wrists that was lifting him out of his bedroom.  The man went onto a great adventure.

I watched as this unfolded in front of me.  The special effects were spectacular.  I pondered how they did the effects.  This story line seemed familiar to me.  Suddenly, I was scared.

“This was one of my nightmares that I had as a child!”  I turned to the assistant.  “Why are you showing my old nightmares?”

“This did start out as a nightmare, but you turned it around and made an adventure out of it.  Don’t you remember?  We had to recycle this dream, due to the writer’s strike.” 

“Why are you resorting to my old dreams?”  I pulled the curtain closed and walked down the hallway.

“We are desperate right now.  There is a need for tons of dreams but the writer’s strike is preventing the new material from coming out.  We have even resorted to picking up old scripts from the trashcan and just stapling them together at random.”

“What?” I looked at her. “That’s ridiculous!  The scenes would just jump randomly without making any sense.”

“Do you remember your dream last night?  How the scenes jumped around?”

I stared into her eyes. “How did you know about my drea…?  Of course.  You make the dreams around here.  This is too much for me to handle right now.”  I sat down on a bench.

“I think it will do you some good to look at a few other sets.  Come here.” She laid her clipboard down onto the bench and grabbed my hands.  “Come on.  There’s a lot for you to see.”

We went from set to other sets.  We saw some fantasies, nightmares, romances, comedic dreams, and even a few mature dreams. 

When we looked in on the adult-themed dream, I blushed when I saw what it was.  I blushed again when I recognized one of the models as being from one of my own dreams.  The production assistant laughed at my red face.

“Come and watch a rehearsal,” she said.  We went into a rehearsal where the actors were tied to wires.  They would fly through the skies and then suddenly plunge.  I shivered as I remembered having a few of these dreams.

“I never understood why we have flying and falling dreams. Do we like to be scared at night?”

“Do you like to be scared?”

“Well, at least it’s not taking a pop quiz in school  that I never studied for.    Maybe it’s because I am an actor, but I had several dreams where I was on stage during a live performance, and I did not know any of my lines.”

“Wait until you see the next set, Tracy.”

We looked in on a set that looked like a boardroom.  Several well-dressed people sat around a table waiting for a presentation.  A man walked out, wearing only boxer shorts.  He tried very hard to give the presentation, in between trying to covering up his boxer shorts.  My own stomach felt tight as I watched him.  “Ahhh!  Let’s move on quickly, please!”

The assistant chuckled again at me.  She had a wonderful laugh.

We watched a few romantic dreams, each with a different ending.  Some ended with a long kiss.  Others ended on a beach, as they walked off into the sunset in each other’s arms.  One ended with the lover leaving the hero alone on a hill, overlooking a winding river below.

The assistant looked at my tears.  “You are crying.  You are a big romantic at heart, aren’t you?”

I wiped the tears away.  “No, I’m not.  I just liked the view of the river, is all.”

She chuckled again. “If I recall, many of your dreams involved romance of some kind.”

I felt a little naked having someone knowing what my dreams were about.  “So, have you seen all of my dreams?”

“Every single one of them, Romeo.”  I blushed.  “Based on your dreams, I know your fears, your deepest desires, your hopes, your short-comings, your strengths… and your future.”

“How can you figure out what my future is, based on my dreams?”

“It’s a pretty good indicator of where you are going. Thieves have dreams about crime. Executives have dreams about the boardroom. Musicians dream about music. Children dream about great professions or giant bags of candy. When you stop dreaming, you will stop living. When you stop living, you will cease dreaming.”

I looked down at my feet. My own dreams stopped awhile back. Her words hit too closely. “It’s childish to have dreams! They are just a waste of time. They… will just disappoint you. It’s better to live in a realistic world.”

“Yes, you do have to live in a realistic world. However, dreams can change the realistic world. Aircraft, automobiles, architecture, and computers all came from people’s dreams. If you have no vision, you will cease to be.”

I turned away from her and walked a few steps away. Emotions were building inside of me. I used to have all of these grand dreams, but life seemed to beat them down, one by one. Fear overcame me, and I changed the course of my life. Due to fear, I ended up shutting myself off from the world. Soon, my dreams slowly died off to the point of where I just existed. I was just waiting until my death.

The assistant came up from behind me and put her hand on my shoulder. “Waiting for your death, is no way to live.”

We stood there for a moment. “Is it too late to start living again?”

“Not as long as you have breath. Why don’t you just start out small, and write one of your dreams down? I know that there are a few deep down inside of you.” I turned around and looked at her. It did not seem to be such a bad idea. It was a little inspiring to be around all of these dreams that were going on around me.

She led me into a room where a computer was located on a desk. The room had several monitors in it. A few were live feeds of dreams that were going on. One of the monitors showed a feed that looked like tapes rewinding and fast-forwarding. I asked what that feed was from.

“That’s from the newsroom across town. Each night, the dreamer receives a newscast from the day’s events and then they enjoy one of our productions. Sometimes, our productions are based on the news of the day.”

I pondered this. “Newscasts? News from what?”

“The newsroom edits their events during the day and shows them highlights. The dreamer can more easily digest the day’s events overnight. This is how they figure out basic ideas, such as who is their friends or enemies. They can problem solve their greatest tests and trials. Their morality comes into question here, on rather they have it or do they just wish to bypass it. This is the time where people decide if they will marry someone or not.  They will ponder if their love is true or not. They decide if their current job is where they want to be. They will decide their religious beliefs here. All of their life’s issues are played out before them. It’s always up to them whichever path they want to choose. Sometimes, prejudices, fear, pride or just plain ignorance will sway their judgment.”

A few things started to make sense about my dreams. I pointed to another monitor that was glowing. “What does that monitor show?”

“That is a prophecy monitor. God Himself runs that one. On certain nights with certain people, God will insert a vision to them. Sometimes, it will show future events. Sometimes, it will show warnings or events from the past. We never know when it will be used, but we do know that  it is extremely important when it is used. Some of the other monitors are showing live broadcasts of dreams that are in progress. Here’s your computer. I will leave you alone for a few minutes. I believe in you.”

I sat down at the desk and stared into the monitor. The monitor only showed a blank page with one single blinking cursor. How does one start writing a dream? The assistant had told me to start out small.

I timidly started to type. ‘A man is sitting at his bed.’ I leaned back, imagining this man sitting at his bed. I asked myself, ‘What’s next?’

I typed, ‘The man stands up from his bed and gets dressed.’ Okay, it’s a little boring, but I just started. Little by little, I start imagining all of the things that this man is going through. Pretty soon, my fingers had a hard time keeping up with my thoughts. A few times, I had to stop thinking while my fingers furiously tried to catch back up.

It was during one of these times, that I noticed one of the monitors to my left. The man had fallen to the ground. It struck me as odd, since I had just written these words: ‘The man had tripped on the edge of the sidewalk and quickly looked around to see if anyone had noticed his folly.’

I shrugged my shoulders and continued typing. I wrote that the man got up, brushed his pants and starting running down the sidewalk. The man on the monitor did exactly the same thing. I chuckled. “That’s certainly a coincidence,” I said out loud. “Well, my guy is going to trip again.” I typed in my commands. The man on the monitor tripped. I quickly rose from my chair and went close to the monitor. The man in the monitor just remained on the ground for a long time.

“That dream is going to be mightily boring. Wow, a man just sitting on the sidewalk. Be still my heart.”

I sat back down and started to type. ‘The man stood up…’ I watched the man stand up on the monitor. I typed, ‘The man barked like a dog.’ The man in the monitor began barking.

“LADY!” I shouted. “Hey, Lady!”

The assistant came running in. “What’s wrong?”

“That man is doing exactly what I am typing, right when I am typing it!”

She looked at the monitor. “Oh, yea. That is a live dream in progress. The actors are reading from the TelePrompTer.”

“I never agreed to write an actual dream!”

“Well, it’s a writer’s strike and we will take whatever we can.”

At that moment, an older man with gray hair and round glasses came in the door. “Hey, it’s Tracy! It’s good to see you back in that chair. It’s about time you wrote dreams again.”

I looked at this man closely. I did not recall this man. “How do you know me? I don’t write dreams. Why, I haven’t even had a good dream in years.”

He laughed. “Yes, it’s been awhile since you had a good dream. Well, I for one am glad that the writer’s strike is over. I can’t wait until your next great adventure dream. Or will it be another romance?”

I looked at the assistant. “Is he saying that I was the writer on strike?”

She bit her upper lip. “Well, Tracy. You did stop dreaming dreams. You no longer had a vision. We did the best we could until you came back. Don’t you remember us?”

I sat back into the chair. Short visions kept popping in my head. I was slowly remembering.

“Jan?” Jan the assistant nodded her head. “Robert?”

“Please, call me Bob, Tracy.”

I remembered. This was a giant play box. You could do anything you wanted around here. My mind’s imagination was almost limitless around here.

Bob spoke, “Tracy, do you remember that wonderful dream you had, where you were about to save all of those school children in the bus and right then the doorbell rang?”

I scratched my head. “Yes, yes I remember it. Some guy just wanted to know if he could mow my lawn at six in the morning. I told him that I didn’t need it.”

“You tried to go back to sleep, but all you ended up dreaming for the rest of the time was income tax forms.”

“Yes, that made me mad. Never interrupt a hero in the middle of saving school children. It’s just not right!”

Bob and Jan laughed.

Suddenly, a fear overcame me. “Hey! I don’t want to write other people’s dreams. It just doesn’t seem right.”

Jan answered, “We would not let you write other people’s dreams. You can only write your own dreams.”

“What about the writer’s strike?”

Jan touched my shoulders. “Your strike is now over. You are back. Now that you can start dreaming again, you can start to live again. I always believed in you. I knew that you would return. You now know your place around here.”

Bob punched my shoulder. “Welcome back, Tracy. Welcome back. Now finish up that story. That man has been barking for the last ten minutes.”

I looked over at the monitor and saw the barking man. “Oh my! Sorry about that!”

I returned to the keyboard and finished writing my dream.

Suddenly, I heard a car honking.

I awoke from my bed with a jolt.

“Who could that be?”

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THEATRE OF DREAMS
(C) 2007 by Tracy Young www.tracyyoung.tv
Dream Photography (C) 2007 by Louie Psihoyos

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IF YOU LIKED THIS YOU MAY ALSO LIKE:
One Night in a Jail Cell
John the Baptist’s last few hours.
Long Silent Weekend
Enduring the long weekend of silence as Jesus laid in the tomb.

Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” Mark 9:23 (NKJV)

Almost every Christian has experienced unbelief and doubt. It can be difficult at times for our natural brains to comprehend the supernatural around us. I have personally seen many supernatural miracles and at times, I still have bouts of unbelief.

I have prayed for miracle healings with people and then watched many of them supernaturally healed. I have witnessed deformed limbs as they returned to normal. I had a front row seat as the Holy Spirit worked miracles in other people’s bodies and minds. Pains in my body left immediately after an elder once prayed over me.

I have prayed over people to get desperately needed jobs or some kind of financial assistance. They have reported back the next day with the most amazing stories. God has been good!

However, I have also prayed over sick people and they continued their decline until they died. My own illnesses at times have taken weeks to be healed. Despite being prayed over, others have continued without having a job and the bills just kept coming in. A military man that I prayed for had his funeral last year.

Shortly after that, a friend of mine and a great man of God suddenly died of a heart attack. I received calls from his friends asking for me and for a few others to come to the hospital to help raise him from the dead. I fully believe in raising the dead, but I also knew that this man of God was meant to be with God.  Grief still overwhelmed me for a while.

I was reminded back in high school when a friend of mine died after his steering wheel malfunctioned. He was his school’s president, highly popular, a football player and he did a lot of mission work. He brought many to Christ and he might have accomplished way more than the average person ever would have. However, God still allowed him to come home at seventeen.  Over forty students gave their lives to Christ at his funeral.

That hit me hard and I questioned God’s reasoning. This man was filled with prophetic insights from the Holy Spirit. Why did he not get an insight about his steering wheel? Why was he not protected? I was hurt and I started to doubt God.

As I matured in the Lord, unbelief still came from time to time. Many times, it actually came right after a huge miracle or a great moment in life. I would be so on-fire for God, letting everyone know what had just happened.

Out of the darkness, a collision would occur. My heart would T-bone with the enemy. Sometimes, I would look at all the debris around me and just continue to praise God. Sometimes, I would get mad at the enemy and command him to leave me alone. A few times, I would just sit in the middle of the accident scene and wallow in my pain. I would doubt.

I am a man of God. The Holy Spirit uses me to spread the Word of God and to bring healings and comfort to others. Somebody needs to hear and to know that this particular man of God has been known to doubt and to wrestle with unbelief.

Occasionally, great people of God will let it be known that they have had doubts. Sometimes people are shocked or even get angry with them. They think that people of God should never have doubts or disbelief. Some will even condemn those who have wrestled with doubt. It happened to Mother Teresa, Billy Graham, and to John the Baptist. It will happen to most Christians at least once in their lives. Congratulations if you have never had this fight. If you are being honest, you are in the minority.

As his execution was approaching, John the Baptist wrestled with offense and doubts. John sent his followers to Jesus to ask Him if He was indeed the “One”, or if he needed to continue to look for a different Messiah.

“And when John had heard in prison about the works of Christ, he sent two of his disciples and said to Him, “Are You the Coming One, or do we look for another?”

Jesus answered and said to them, “Go and tell John the things which you hear and see: The blind see and the lame walk; the lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear; the dead are raised up and the poor have the gospel preached to them. And blessed is he who is not offended because of Me.” Matthew 11:2-6 (NKJV)

John the Baptist lived his entire life for one purpose, which was to show the way to the coming Messiah. He lived out in the wilderness on a special diet. He knew that the Holy Spirit would fall upon the Messiah as like a dove. John baptized Jesus and watched as the Holy Spirit fell upon Jesus.  They heard the voice of God state that Jesus was His Son, with Whom He was well pleased.

John told everyone that Jesus was the Messiah. Shortly before he was to be executed, offense and loneliness started drifting in.  John started to question what he already knew. Notice here that Jesus did not get mad or furious about this. He simply told John’s followers to spend the day with the Lord and to report back what they saw. After they left, Jesus ended up BRAGGING about John the Baptist.

“‘I tell you the truth: Among those born of women there has not risen anyone greater than John the Baptist; yet he who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he. From the days of John the Baptist until now, the kingdom of heaven has been forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it. For all the Prophets and the Law prophesied until John. And if you are willing to accept it, he is the Elijah who was to come. He who has ears, let him hear.”" Matthew 11:11-15 (NIV) (Emphasis mine.)

Jesus did not freak out and tear John the Baptist apart. He stood up and bragged to everyone about how John was one of the greatest men who lived. Discreetly, he did let John know to not hold offenses against Him. This demonstrates to us that God is not shocked when you have battles of unbelief.

God doesn’t fall off of His throne and scream out, “Wha-what!?!” God loves us! God is not out to zap us at every turn. He will correct us when we are wrong, but His love for us will never diminish.

As you walk with the Lord and fill yourself with His Word, many doubts will start to go away. Eventually, we will have to start walking in faith, with no doubts.

“If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.” James 1:4-8 (NIV)

God lets us know that we should not doubt, but how do we get to the point where our doubts start to decline and our faith increases?

“So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.” Matthew 10:17 (NKJV)

Get the Word of God inside of you. Read the Bible, quote the Bible, and live by the Bible. Hang out with friends that know the Word of God, and go to a church that preaches out of the Bible. The Holy Spirit will use the Word of God to impact your heart and your decisions. Your unbelief will start to come less and less. Eventually, you will experience miracles and your faith will increase more and more. You will doubt Jesus less.  You will overcome!

“So Jesus answered and said to them, “Assuredly, I say to you, if you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what was done to the fig tree, but also if you say to this mountain, ‘Be removed and be cast into the sea,’ it will be done. And whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.”" Matthew 21:21-22 (NKJV)

Late one night, the disciples were in a boat when they saw a figure approaching on the water. They thought that it might be Jesus. Peter shouted out, “If you really are Jesus, may I step out and walk on the water with You?”  Jesus answered, “Come on! The top of the water feels good!”

Peter had faith and stepped out onto the water.  He enjoyed walking on top of it. However, those back in the boat started to yell unbelief at him. Ever notice that those who are not brave enough to step out supernatually with God will quickly mock those that do?

The thunder started making noises. The wind started blowing harder.  The waves started splashing with more fierceness. Whenever you step out of the boat and out of your comfort zone, the environment around you will start to go crazy. Remember what James 1:6 said, “…because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.”

Jesus just said, “Come.” Do you believe the Word of God, or those shouting unbelief? Do you believe Jesus or the loud thunder? Do you believe the harsh wind around you? When stuff is splashing on your face, do you just keep walking or do you let it stop you?

“But when he saw the strong wind and the waves, he was terrified and began to sink. “Save me, Lord!” he shouted. Jesus immediately reached out and grabbed him. “You have so little faith,” Jesus said. “Why did you doubt me?” When they climbed back into the boat, the wind stopped. ” Matthew 14:30-32 (NLT)

Peter actually did walk on the water again. I do not think that Jesus picked Peter up and threw him around His shoulders. Jesus reached down and then they both walked back together towards the boat.  They went through the exact same wind and waves. The weather did not die down until they were both back inside the boat. It showed Peter that we could do the supernatural, as long as we keep our eyes on the Lord.

Jesus ended up building the church with Peter.  John the Baptist was executed, but Jesus bragged about him. Mother Teresa had bouts of doubt in the midst of loneliness, pain and suffering, but she was an inspiration to all Christians and even to non-Christians across the world. Early on, Billy Graham had struggles but he also became a household name everywhere. His impact will remain throughout many generations to come. I do not think any less about any of these people. I refuse to think any less of these servants of God.

Jesus loves me, even after knowing all of my secrets and my shortcomings. We are all to strive to be more like Christ, but that process will take us the rest of our lives. Until we die or until Jesus returns, we should continue to become more like Christ.

God can use us more when our faith is stronger, but He will also use us right where we are at. This should encourage you to keep your eyes on the Lord, even if you have wrestled with unbelief.  Keep your eyes on the Lord, even with the heavy winds and waves.

If you fail, our Lord will just reach down and pick you back up. Unfortunately, the storms will not truly be over until we both reach the boat. We can still live in victory, depending on where you are looking at.

If you are wrestling with doubts right now, then look towards Jesus.  Pray about it.  Peter’s prayer was simply, “Save me, Lord!”  I have prayed that before.  Lay it at His feet.  Read the Word and live in faith.  You are an overcomer!

—
LORD I BELIEVE – HELP MY UNBELIEF
(C) 2007 Tracy Young – www.tracyyoung.tv
Photography (C) 2007 Kaz Chiba
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Sometimes, you do not have any words when you are alone with God.

I decided to take a look my friends that I am close with. I noticed that God has blessed each and everyone of them! Let’s look at some of the reasons why.

They ALL bless other people. They all are servants. They all give their tithes. Even though they do not have to, they all give offerings. They all give their time and talents for the glory of the Kingdom of God.

That inspires me to want to do the same thing!

Offerings are not always about money, but also includes your time and talents. This is not always about the big, huge talents that gets a lot of recognition. Some quietly cook for the homeless ministry twice a month. Some teach small groups. Some run cameras at church. Some are ushers or pray for others during altar calls.

Even just holding a door open for an elderly couple counts as an offering. There are several different areas where you can give an offering and they all serve as worship towards the Father. Yes, cooking for the homeless is worship! God is honored and He is well pleased.

Proverbs 19:17 says, “He who has pity on the poor lends to the LORD, and He will pay back what he has given.” (NKJV).

God will even pay you back for what you offered up, so you can continue to bless others. God loves to bless His children!

If you are having trouble getting started to where you can start to bless other people, start hanging out with friends that do bless others. It will FIRE you up. It will inspire you!

If you do not have friends like that, start praying to God to send you some Godly friends that will inspire you. Godly friends can also hold you accountable. When I started tithing, I was accountable to a couple who was mentoring me. After several months, tithing became a natural habit. They helped me to stay on track at the beginning.

Godly friends will inspire you and soon you will be an inspiration to others.

===
INSPIRED FRIENDLY OFFERINGS 
(C) 2007 Tracy Young www.debtfreelegacy.com
Photography (C) 2007 Jack Hollingsworth
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(Malachi 3:8-12 AMP)

God speaks, “Will a man rob or defraud God? Yet you rob and defraud Me.”

Man looks perplexed and asks, “In what way do we rob or defraud You?”

God answers, “You have withheld your tithes and offerings. You are cursed with the curse, for you are robbing Me, even this whole nation.”

Man ponders how to reverse the curse.

God looks at Man and says, “Bring ALL the tithes (the whole tenth of your income) into the storehouse, that there may be food in My house, and prove Me now by it, says the Lord of hosts, if I will not open the windows of heaven for you and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.”

Man looks at God with a startled expression.  God has never asked anyone to test Him before.  This was serious challenge.

God continued, “And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes and he shall not destroy the fruits of your ground, neither shall your vine drop its fruit before the time in the field, says the Lord of hosts.”

Man starts thinking to himself, that having the devourer rebuked FOR him is so much better than an curse.  It was exciting that he would be able to keep the existing fruit and to be blessed in all future work.

God was not done, yet.  God continued, “And all nations shall call you happy and blessed, for you shall be a land of delight, says the Lord of hosts.”

Man thinks about what was said.  “So on one hand, if I don’t tithe and give back to Your house, I am cursed with a curse.  Okay.  On the other hand, if I give back to You a portion of what is ALREADY Yours, I will have the windows of heaven opened with blessings poured upon me.  In addition, I will not have room enough to receive it?  Why would I have too much of blessings and no where to put it?”

Before God could answer, Man figured it out.  “So that I would bless OTHERS with it!  I would have the devourer rebuked for me, have all of my fruit secured, and the world would call me happy and blessed!”

God said, “I challenge you.  Test me on this.”

Man replied, “Do I take the curses or the blessings?  This is so lop-sided, there is only one choice.  I will take the blessings and I challenge you, Lord of Hosts!”

The Lord of Hosts simply said, “You shall then be a land of delight.”

====

   ” “Will a man rob God?
      Yet you have robbed Me!
      But you say,

      ‘ In what way have we robbed You?’
      In tithes and offerings.
        You are cursed with a curse,
      For you have robbed Me,
      Even this whole nation.
        Bring all the tithes into the storehouse,
      That there may be food in My house,
      And try Me now in this,”
      Says the LORD of hosts,

      ” If I will not open for you the windows of heaven
      And pour out for you such blessing
      That there will not be room enough to receive it.
        ” And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes,
      So that he will not destroy the fruit of your ground,
      Nor shall the vine fail to bear fruit for you in the field,”
      Says the LORD of hosts;
        And all nations will call you blessed,
      For you will be a delightful land,”
      Says the LORD of hosts.” (Malachi 3:8-12 NKJV)

===
WORLD SHOCKED AS GOD CHALLENGES MAN
(C) 2007 Tracy Young www.debtfreelegacy.com
Illustrations (C) 2007 by Paul Gilligan
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HEART PASSION 

Mike Oviedo is a jovial man, who teaches with passion about evangelism in our church.  He once asked me if I had a passion in my heart for the souls of others.  I looked at my feet and said, “I don’t know.  I guess I do.”

He stared into my eyes.  “You know if you have passion or not.  Ask God to put a passion into your heart for the souls of other.  Pray this each night and get with me next week.”

I rolled my eyes and agreed to his request.  That night, I threw the request in at the end of my prayers.  “Oh yea, one more thing, Lord.  Please put a passion in my heart for the souls of others.  In Jesus’ name.  Amen.”

The next morning, everything seemed to be the same for the most part.  However, the people that annoyed me at work really seemed to get on my nerves that day.  We had several contractors that worked with us in the corner of our building.  I usually ignored them, but on this day, I nodded my head as a hello towards them.  There really were no life-changing events on this day.

I prayed that night and the following night.  I never heard any angels singing.  No promptings from the Holy Spirit.  Life seemed as normal as ever.  One morning, a person at work who likes to mock others, was tearing someone apart in front of everyone.  My blood started boiling towards this person.  I thought to myself that this person is really evil and that she needs the love of Jesus on her heart.  If she would just accept Jesus as her Lord and Savior then perhaps she would not have this need to spread hatred towards her co-workers.  I really wanted to let out a barrage of curse words towards her, but suddenly I felt the need to pray for her instead.  I was on the verge of making a spectacle out of myself and instead resorted to private prayers.  This confused me.  Let’s get this straight.  This really confused me.  I wasted some good cursing back there and then ended up praying for blessings over this evil person.

A few days later, I was looking across my workplace and really started to look at their faces.  I pondered what they did on their days off.  I wondered if they knew Jesus or not.  A few confessed Him and showed fruit in their lives.  A few confessed Him, but lived a lifestyle that is contrary to God’s Word.  I felt an ache in my heart and almost started to cry.  I quickly went into the men’s restroom and entered a stall.  This was not normal for me.  I did not cry much in life.  Men are not supposed to cry or to show any weakness at all.  It overwhelmed me, seeing that many people that needed God in their lives.

At a single’s meeting at my church, I looked around and started to really look at their faces.  There were a few unsaved people at church.  I wondered why anyone would go to a single’s group at church if they did not know God.  Having unsaved people in the church surprised me.  This touched my heart and I started praying for them.

I started looking at people differently.  Everyone that I saw was either a Christian family member or a potential family member.  That guy that cut me off in traffic and then gave me the finger needs to know Jesus.  Even that waiter that got my order all wrong also needs to know Jesus.  If that waiter already knows Jesus, then he is my brother in the Lord.

What I was feeling did not seem natural or normal to me.  Mike asked me how the week went and started laughing when I told him.  He said, “That’s the Lord, Tracy!  God put a yearning and a passion in your heart for the souls of others.  God is going to place many people in your path for this reason.”

30 DAYS OF CONVERSATIONS 

Even though I was hesitant, I was very excited about being used by God.  My only problem was that I was too shy to talk anyone.  I heard on the radio about how this one guy was given an assignment to only start short conversations with complete strangers without bringing up Jesus.  He was to do this for thirty days.  The idea was to get him comfortable enough to start conversations without the worry of doing the evangelism part.  I decided to do this assignment and made an agreement with God.

One afternoon, I started up a conversation with a man standing behind me at a Jack in the Box, as we waited to give our order.  “Nice hot day today, huh?”  The man grunted.  My exciting thirty days had begun. 

For the most part, my quick conversation starters went well.  I talked to strangers about the weather, the current sports news, and any other “safe” conversations.  I was glad that I agreed to this for thirty days.

Then on the third day…

During my lunch hour, I was in line at a Luby’s Cafeteria carrying a Jesse Duplantis book.  I ordered my food and sat down at a booth.  I don’t actually remember if I had a starter conversation with the people behind me.  Either way, the lady and the man came to my booth and stood by it.  The lady asked, “Would you mind if we ate with you?  I would like to know more about Jesus.”

I actually felt my eyes pop out of their sockets.  If I had a mouth full of water, I would have spewed it all over them.  I was lucky that I did not choke on my food.  With a high-pitched voice, I said, “Sure, sit down.”  I cleared my throat.

I shot God a quick mean look.  I said inside, ‘I thought we had a agreement for thirty days, that I would only do starter questions!’  There was no response from God.  I was actually looking forward to reading my book and really wanted to be left alone.  I told God, ‘This is really not convenient right now!  Hello? Alright-alright-alright!’

I reluctantly closed my book and watched them as they sat down and removed items from their trays. I asked, “What exactly do you want to know about Jesus?”

The girl joyfully said, “I want to know everything.”  I glanced at the clock.  I only had twenty minutes to eat with them and still have time to get back to work.  I started talking and we bounced back and forth.  I was surprised how the Bible verses seem to flow out of nowhere at the right time.  I was disappointed that they did not ultimately give their lives to Jesus. They even seemed more convinced than ever to stay away from Him.  Still, I knew that it is the Holy Spirit’s job to convict them and not me.  Truth is truth, rather people accept it or not.  The Holy Spirit would continue to work on them with other people and situations.

As I drove back to work, I had an energetic conversation with God.  God never actually agreed to the thirty days.  It was a good idea, but God just did not want to wait twenty-seven more days to have me talk with this couple.  They were ready NOW.  The Holy Sprit was ready.  Jesse Duplantis himself would not have minded that I had to wait to read his book.  This was more important than my own comfort.

AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH 

I was pretty excited to have had my first assignment from God.  I later found out that these were called “divine appointments.”  I went to bed early that night and rose early the next morning at four o’clock.

At 4:00 AM, I started praying and praising God.  I had an enjoyable time with God and was expecting great miracles during my workday.  I went to work early and started looking for people to pray with.  I walked around with my right hand extended out, searching for someone to have hands laid upon them.  For whatever reason, we had very few people at work on that day.  Everyone was in a rush and they were dashing by quickly.  They were able to escape “the hands.”  In my mind, I could hear myself say, “Do you want to know Jesus…  Do you want… Uh… How about you?  You? Anyone?  Anyone?  Bueller?  Bueller?”

I was looking for any excuse to bring God up during the day.  ‘You said you are thirsty?  Well, Jesus can quench that thirst for you.’  ‘You said you need a pen?  You need Jesus, is what you need.’  ‘You said it’s hot in here?  Do you know where it’s REALLY hot?’  ‘You said hello?  You should say hi to the Lord!’   There was never an actual opening to talk about God on this day, no matter how hard I tried to fit it in.

I went home tired with all of my religious works.  I decided that I would not wake up at four in the morning again.  I changed my alarm clock and went to bed early.  Unknown to me at the time, I accidentally set it for PM instead of AM.

The next morning, I quietly woke up on my own and stared at the alarm clock.  It said 7:20 AM.  I needed to be at work at 8:00 AM.  My mind came up with the erroneous conclusion that I had one hour and forty minutes to sleep before the alarm would go off.  I went back to bed and started dreaming about arithmetic.  In my sleep, my mind came up with the conclusion that I have forty minutes to get to work.  I woke up with a shout.  It was now 7:30 AM.  I was going to be late to work!

I got up and ran to the bathroom to splash water on my face.  My hair was sticking out in as many directions that are available to mankind.  It looked like I stuck a wet finger into an electrical outlet.  I started to run a brush through it, but after pulling out chucks of badly tangled hair, I concluded that I would just comb it on the drive to work.

I threw on a pair of pants and accidentally put on a shirt backwards and ran to get my wallet and keys.  My hands reached out to where I normally keep them and I grabbed thin air.  Panic attack.  I went in the bedroom and destroyed it, looking for my wallet and keys.  I ran to the bathroom, the kitchen and the dining room.  There on the chair around the dining table was my old pair of pants that I had worn the day before.  I grabbed them and felt the wallet and keys.  I also found a comb and some loose change.  At 7:40 AM, I screamed again and ran out the front door.  At least, I was getting the circulation going in my body.

Let’s just say that there are eleven traffic lights from my house to my work and I ended up waiting at every single one of them.  Morning traffic was backed up and several cars cut me off.  I seemed to pick the slowest lane, no matter how many times I switched.  I had forgotten to comb my hair in the car and continued to look like a full- grown Chia pet.  At 7:50 AM, I caught a glimpse of it in my rear view mirror as I was exiting the car.  I concluded that I would need to run to the bathroom at work and comb it there.

I ran inside the building and started to make a dash for the bathroom.  A technician leaving the building took one look at my hair and said, “I guess it’s real windy outside, huh?”  I replied, “Uh, yea.”

A co-worker shouted at me, “Tracy, I am running late.  Could you make me twenty copies of the morning log for me?”  I grumbled under my breath, as I was already running late myself.  I took a look at the clock:  7:52 AM.  I could take the log, start warming up the copier, make a dash for the bathroom, make the copies and still be on time at 8:00 AM.  It was going to be okay.

I went over to our main copier machine but was cut off by a man in a suit with papers about four inches thick.  The man gave me an apologetic shrug and proceeded to hit ten copies of the four-inch thick document.  I almost kicked him in the shin, but thought better of it.  Instead, I turned around and made an over exaggerated mimic of his apologetic shrug.  Apparently, I turn into a spoiled child very early in the morning.

I looked across the room, on the other side of the building and saw the smaller copier machine.  I decided to race over there before anyone else had the chance.  The copier was already warmed up, so I decided to make the copies before running to the bathroom to comb my hair.  After the first of twenty copies came out, I took it from the copier machine to staple it.  We have this very fancy stapler where you just slide the papers into it and it will automatically staple it with a loud gun sound.  However, there was no gun sound, but only a quiet thud came out.  My brain processed that there were no staples in it, but I still proceeded to try it about seven more times.  Thud, Thud, Thud, Thud, Thud, Thud, Thud.  I knew for a fact that there were no staples in it, but I just had to open it and still look to see if it had some.  For good measure, I tried it again.  Thud.  Nothing.  It was now 7:54 AM.

I saw another big stapler and was overjoyed.  This was a stapler where you would put a document in it and then push this long bar down until it stapled.  Evidently, this stapler is only meant for very large documents.  I pushed the bar down and it made an extremely loud “KaPow” sound.  I took the document out and noticed that the staples were two inches long!  That would be perfect if you were stapling a copy of the Bible, but not if you are only stapling five pages.  It stapled down and then went back up again with two large spikes that could cut your fingers off.  “Uh oh,” I screamed.

Instead of just throwing the copy away, I decided to try to save it.  I very carefully, tried to extricate the two giant knives sticking up from the paper without slicing my fingertips off.  My whole mind was focused on getting this giant staple removed. Pick. Pick. Pick.

A quiet voice from behind spoke up, “Excuse me, Tracy?”

Without looking up, I murmured, “Mm-hmm.” Pick. Pick. Pick.

“Uh..  You’re religious, right?”

I cringed.  I hated that word.  Jesus was not religious.  Religious, self-centered people were the main people that Jesus had a problem with.  I continued to pick at the staple.  Pick. Pick. Pick.  I did not want a debate on the issue, so I just answered, “Yea, sure.” Pick. Pick. Pick.  This was a female contractor that I had never really spoken too.  I might have said a passing hello or gave a nodding of the head.  As a Christian, people are watching you even when you don’t realize it.

“I have been watching you. Can you tell me everything you know about God?”

I kept picking.  I thought to myself, ‘Everything about God?  This might take awhile.  Where were you yesterday when I had a whole bunch of time?  Why did you have to wait until today?’  I answered out loud, “What do you want to know?”

There was a moment of silence.  I stopped picking and I looked up over at her.  Her body was shaking and tears were flowing upon her cheeks.  The Holy Spirit was working through her in a powerful way.  I looked over at the clock:  7:56 PM.  She wants me to tell her all about God!  Many educated men throughout all of the ages have written and discussed this topic for thousands of years.  If you were to read every current book in a local Christian bookstore, it would take you the rest of your life.  She wants me to tell her all about God… In four minutes!

I still had to comb my hair, make copies, staple them together, clock in and get my computer turned on and ready to go by 8:00 AM!

There is something about the Christian walk that I have figured out time and time again.  Many generations of people throughout all of history has figured this out.  GOD IS NOT CONVENIENT!

There is something inherent in almost every male.  We do not like to see the sight of a female crying.  We will usually do anything within our power to stop it.  How about when they are crying because the Holy Spirit is working in their heart?

The clock turned to 7:57 AM.  I now had three minutes to give information that will change a person throughout all of eternity.  What could one say?  There is absolutely nothing that one could say in three minutes that would change a person throughout all of eternity. 

However, if you allow the Holy Spirit to talk through you, that same three minutes would have VOLUMES spoken to them.  If you would just be faithful and to open your mouth and then allow the Holy Spirit to talk through you, you will see miracles happen right in front of your face.  You might actually “witness” the transformation right before your eyes.  That moment in time where their hearts are changed and their walk with the Lord begins.  This is a great honor and it has nothing to do with your actual words.  It is the Holy Spirit working inside of you.  It’s not our job to convict people of sin, but it is the Holy Spirit’s job.  The Holy Spirit is a gentleman and will back off if you are insistent on being the one talking.  However, when you try to convict people of sin, all you will cause is anger and hurt feelings, without the person changing their lives.  The Holy Spirit does take the pressure off of you.  You are just to be faithful and to open your mouth.

With the Holy Spirit doing the talking, this girl gave her life to Jesus in less than three minutes.  It was an amazing thing to experience.  You could feel the Holy Spirit working in and around her.  I clocked in and turned my computer on at exactly 8:00 AM.  As a Christian, people are watching to see if you are different or just like them.  They want to know if you come in late, slack off or lie and cheat.  They will notice if you log in late, even if you are doing something good.  I have learned that God can use you in those short minutes in between breaks and lunches, and still get you to work on time.  I can’t use God as an excuse to be late.

There was so much that I wanted to tell her and I figured that I would have many opportunities.  I just knew that she needed her own Bible.  I always keep nice Bibles in my trunk for just such an occasion.  However, on this day I only had one Men’s Study Bible left.  Even though she may not have minded, I just did not want to give a woman a Men’s Study Bible.  The Holy Spirit was prodding in my heart to give her a Bible and for that day.

I was thinking about taking my lunch hour and driving through thick traffic to get her a new one from a nearby Christian bookstore.   I kept debating in my mind that I don’t have any time to do it that day.  I can do it anytime. After all, I have all of the time in the world.  However, the Holy Spirit kept nudging me to get it that day.

At lunch, I took off from work and drove through heavy traffic to a Christian bookstore.  The clerk asked me if I knew that I had my shirt on backwards.  No one else revealed this to me the entire day!  Suddenly, I remembered that I never combed my hair, neither.  How can God use a very tired guy who looks like a bum?

I bought a nice study Bible for new believers and put my new Christian sister’s name on the cover.  I was able to return in time for the end of my lunch hour.  When I gave her the Bible, she started shaking and crying again.  I had so many things that I still wanted to tell her, but I only had three minutes left.  I threw in a few tracts for new believers and told her to start reading in John.  I threw in a few odds and ends to say and clocked in right at the top of the hour. I still had more to say, but I thought I still had all of the time in the world.

She left an hour before I got off work.  I returned on Monday when they told me that she no longer worked for the company.  She had gone to a competitor and was not allowed to say anything until after she had left.  She had also moved out of town and I never saw her again.

I kept trying to talk myself out of talking with her, thinking that I had a lot of time to do it later.  However, the Holy Spirit kept on being persistent.  He already knew that I only had a total of six minutes with her.  It was six minutes that changed the course of her life, her walk, and her eternity.

I had to trust that the Holy Spirit would be there to guide this brand new baby in the Lord.  I prayed that she would find a good church and people to share her faith with.  I already knew the Holy Spirit was going to teach her the Word of God.  I thanked God for giving me this wonderful opportunity to have a front row seat and watching the Holy Spirit work.  I learned that I should always rely on the Lord and not my own religious duties.  I have so much to learn.  I do know that I have a passion in my heart for the souls of others.

I still think God can be so inconvenient at times, however.

—
GOD IS NOT CONVENIENT!
(C) 2007 Tracy Young www.tracyyoung.tv
Photography (C) 2007 John Howard
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